Although I finished work last… Wednesday, I’ve come in every day since then as a “volunteer”.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy being here. It’s comfy & air-conditioned. I get to drink tea and chat with folks. And, I had a lot of organizing left to do for the new ALT.

But being a volunteer, I didn’t show up until after noon, usually.

Today I arrived early, (well, 10 am) because I had a solid project I wanted to finish before tomorrow. And the place was deserted. Teachers were there, as evidenced by their cars in the lot, but the staffroom was locked and dark.

Well Well, thought I, I’ll just give this a wait. And so I napped in the break room for an hour. Then I gave it up as lost, and went to pick up more supplies for my project, & lunch.

At SOGO Department Store, I ran into the full female cast of the Speech Contest Staff, on their way to lunch. They invited me along, but I declined… though not with a little reluctance. There is one staff member who looks like a Takarazuka actress, and I have a huge girl-crush on her. Oh well, another day.

Yesterday I moved into my new temporary home. It’s sad, because after moving all my stuff out of the apartment and cleaning, it looks so nice that I am extra sad to leave.

I thought I had everything sorted as far as baggage, but even with my suitcases full, I had 3 extra carry-bags. One is full of Awa Odori stuff, granted (to be returned on the 16th). But the rest of it… oh man, how did this happen?

The new place is alright. There are a few funny things.

1. It’s on the ground floor, which gives me a little bit of heebie-jeebies even though all the doors lock securely.
2. It’s somebody else’s house, full of somebody else’s stuff, which I am afraid to touch / ruin.
3. When I say somebody else’s stuff, what I mean is nice, old, Japanese-antique type stuff. I really just can’t relax there.

Tomorrow, it’s off to the airport to meet the new ALT. Then, I have an appointment with some students, then, an afternoon shamisen lesson, then Awa Odori.

Busy summer.

It’ll be a different style. I made this blog to be about my life after JET, but also as a way to share with teachers (and some students) my life after Japan. So the language will be different, simpler. It will be less personal. There will be no cussing. 

(If you want to read that kind of blog, look elsewhere. Some of you know where.)

I’m going to try to make the entries short, and daily. So if you’d like to see some generally cheerful blurps about life (in Japan, sometimes in incredibly poorly-written Japanese) you are more than welcome to read.

I may post back here a few times, just to wrap up life in Tokushima (in a colloquial, personal, English sort of way). This is the Tokushima Elephant blog after all, and I will continue in Tokushima until August 17. But from now, I will also be posting on the new blog.
Thanks for reading, these past 3 years! I appreciate it!

 I honestly can’t believe it’s my last day at work.

I feel sad, but I also feel complete unreality. I came, as usual, I’ll wander down to the bento shop and eat lunch as usual. I’m drinking tea and checking my email as usual. But when I leave it will be for the last time.

 It’s sad to think about.

I gave a thank-you letter and a small gift to all the teachers I’ve worked with. It’s not enough to express my real thanks to them, but I tried my best.

One of my favorite co-workers talked to me. We both had tears in our eyes. I’m going to miss teaching with her so much.

So often we say “Oh, let’s meet again” or “I’ll call you / write to you”, and then, we don’t do it. Sometimes we say those things, and I think both of us know that it won’t happen.

I know it’s best to live in the present, and not be hung up on the past. I think, as long as you are not reliving the past, you should still acknowledge it. People aren’t meant to be swept away and forgotten.

 I know I’ll see these teachers again. Possibly even the students. It’s only a question of when.

That’s enough for me. Feeling the shake of an earthquake 5 hours away is as much earthquake experience as I would like to have.

Today I am not doing much… well, actually, I’m really busy. I have a lunch date, and I need to collect my flight reinbursement from the office, and pick up another box at the post office, and get my final HPV vaccine at the clinic, and practice Awa Odori, and try and arrange my packing again….

…but other than that, I am not so busy.
I went to Komatsushima to the Immigration office last week. You know, because everyone says “Oh you should apply at least a month in advance”. But when I called them, they said on the phone “Well, next week is too soon. Maybe the week after?”

So I went at that time. But, they took my application, and then told me, “Come back next week”.  ”On Monday?” I asked. Monday is two days before my visa expires.
“Monday… Monday is probably too soon. Come on Tuesday, or maybe Wednesday.”
Oh, really.

I don’t mind too much. I went on a holiday, so I will only spend vacation days on this week. Also, I had an errand at Akaishii, the next train station down the line. So it was not a problem. But still!! I know it can be done in a day.

They say it’s because we can’t be here on a working visa and a tourist visa at the same time, so maybe it’s best to change on the day of expiration. OH WELL!

I’m working hard writing farewell letters. I bought most of my farewell gifts already…. thanks to the money I won, getting second prize in the speech contest. It’s good, because I didn’t want to spend the money on myself… I don’t need more things! I have too many things already! (Please look at the many packing boxes on my floor as evidence) Luckily, I needs buy presents for folks here. Everything works out fine!

 
I’m going along fine in “Dance of Dragons” on my iPad. I’ll buy a paperback copy when they come out, but for now, electronic reading is OK.

(If you’re not in the loop, “Dance of Dragons” is the latest, long-awaited 5th book in the Song of Ice and Fire fantasy series by George R R Martin. The TV drama of the first book, “Game of Thrones”, just wrapped up on HBO.)

So far, DoD is really…. slow. Ha! The 4th book was split in two, with half of the narrating characters in the 4th book, and the other half in the 5th. So the events of the 5th book are happening at the same time as in the 4th book, and although I was really looking forward to the 5th’s characters (because I missed them so much in the 4th), nothing is really happening! A lot of folks are talking about situations to each other, and making general plans. Sometimes somebody rides a boat from here to there.

But there just aren’t any good villains floating around, or super insane deeds being done, or just… the general madness that happened in the last book. Mostly, it’s just a pile of characters jumbling around the kingdom, and I can’t tell who are the good guys and who are the bad guys. There is nobody I love to hate, only a bunch of unpleasant people that I wish would stop their silly torturing and murdering. Everyone else is very ambivalent. I’m only 400 pages in (it’s 1400 pages on my iPad), eveyone has only had 2 or 3 chapters each, so…. we’re still getting warmed up.

I’ll stick it to the end, of course.

I had my first goodbyes on Tuesday, at Rogakko. We had a big day planned, with final lessons with all the students, that is, three big parties! (elementary, junior high, senior high). Unfortunately… we had a big typhoon. The wind was terribly strong, it was pouring, and much too dangerous for students to come to school.

Of course I went to school because I am a teacher.

The teachers all had the big morning meeting, and I made a speech that I had written. Halfway through, I burst into tears and had to blubber my way through to the end. Whyyyyyy did that happen? Argh. The rest of the day we just relaxed, many teachers took vacation time and went home, we all ate lunch together, and I spent my time working on a bunch of letters I had to write to English Club members.

Final school lunch was miso soup with daikon, onion, and tofu, 2 croquettes, raw okura and tomatoes to munch, cold sour chicken and cabbage salad (yum!), rice, and milk. Delicious!

I’m sad that I couldn’t see the students, but luckily, because I am staying longer, I can see them in August. They have to come to school for some reason, so we’ll do a short meeting then. Better than nothing, I guess!

Yesterday I made the farewell speech at Joto. There was no typhoon, so all the students were there. We cleaned the school really hard. The typhoon had spread a lot of leaves and dirt and branches all over the grounds, and today, the school is being used to host part of the prefectural teacher’s exam. A lot of teachers teaching don’t have their license yet, they are still studying. It’s a difficult license to get, I think.

After cleaning, we had a big ceremony in three parts: one, to congratulate the teams and clubs to had done well in the semester and are going on to compete at higher levels. Two, the closing ceremony & speech from the principal to end the school semester. And three, my goodbye ceremony.

At first, the principal introduced me and what I had done in 3 years. She finished by saying that I kicked butt at the Japanese speech contest the other day, and so I said my speech again at the students.

I’m really glad it happened that way, because I was really comfortable speaking that speech. I have it all memorized, it’s got funny bits, and it helped me relax. Then, I made my actually sad “thank you” farewell speech. I was warmed up, so I didn’t stumble too much, and I didn’t cry, it was a relief.

At the end, I made everyone do Ippon Jime, which is a thing you do to end a gathering or an event. (There is also Sanbon Jime, but I like Ippon better). Everyone holds their hands out, palm up, then the leaders says something.

I said, “本当に　ありがとうございます！” (Thank you so much!), then the leader yells “Yooooooooooi!” and everyone claps their hands together once, in unison. It’s kind of a silly thing to do, so everyone laughed. That was good.

Lastly, the president of English Club gave a great speech in English, and the principal presented me with a certificate and a bunch of flowers. Later, we took some pictures together, and then that was it, school life finished.

The rest of the day, I did some work at my desk, finished grading a bunch of stuff, bullied the travel agents into giving me my plane ticket, got a bunch of paperwork taken care of, threw away old papers, worked on a map of Tokushima for my successor…

Today we have a holiday, so I’m going down south to the immigration office to apply for a Tourist Visa. Yeeeeeehaw!

I’m up to 4 boxes to ship, ugh, even AFTER pruning my wardrobe of 3 huge bags of clothes. I just love clothes too much!

This morning I did a test-packing of my carry-on bag. Even as I was packing things in, I was thinking “Oh, I don’t really need this. I can throw that out.”

So there is still more to go.

My airline baggage is a bit of a… hmmm, silly situation. I’ll be carrying on my shamisen in a big case, so I won’t be allowed a carry-on suitcase as well. So I’m actually checking my little carry-on rolly suitcase, because it is the most damned useful suitcase, and I’ve got two short trips already planned back in the states, where I will use it. I really don’t want to lose this suitcase, because it’s seriously perfect.

So that leaves me with one large checked bag left. It’s going to be a little bit difficult, unless I man up and buy a bigger suitcase. The one I have I actually got for free, so it’s not like I’m losing out there. I’ll look at a recycle shop later and see if I can’t find a bigger case.

I have a third suitcase, that is a soft duffel bag. I’ll be carrying it on as a “purse”, because you have to carry on things like laptop, ipad, cameras (2), tablet… it’s soft and squishy, so it should be OK.

All my underthings and socks will go in the shamisen case, as “padding”, haha!

Tomorrow is the speech contest! I have it memorized, with only a few hiccups. It clocks in at 5 minutes 22 seconds, and I think it’s a pretty darn good speech.

I stopped my diet. For a while, I tried hard, but then I realized that I only have a month left, and all I really want to do is eat all the delicious Japanese food! Hahahah. Even doing it for a little bit changed me, though. I dropped 2 kilograms, and I’ve stopped eating so many cakes and breads (which is a definite bonus for my wallet as well… those cakes were expensive).

The other night, I went to a party with Rogakko teachers, at an Italian restaurant. We had dish after dish of various pastas, veg, wine, meat, and dessert. It took hours, and was fantastically delicious. I felt so, so full.

The next day, I didn’t want to eat anything. At all. I had a snack of peanuts in the morning, gelato on the way home from running errands at 4 pm, and half a pizza I ordered in at 9 pm. I didn’t mean to go for pizza, but they stuck a flyer in my mailbox that looked SO DELICIOUS.

Unfortunately, the most delicious pizza (a margarita pizza) was some insane price… nearly 3,000 yen for a medium. HIGHWAY ROBBERY!! I got tomato, basil, and pepper. At some leftovers for breakfast today. Nom nom nom.

Today I’m going to go swimming in the Anabuki River. Crystal clear water, gorgeous gorge, followed by Yoma’s home-cooked dinner and a sleepy train-ride home. HOORAY!

I TOTALLY didn’t mean to do it.

But… it’s so cute… and hand painted. I couldn’t believe how great it looked on me!

This is the front, with the back panel folded over. I love the colored collar!

The sleeves. Awwww!

The back & sleeves.

The full (lower) back panel. Aren’t the owls adorable?? I love the colors and the tiny purple owl!!

The fabric is also really light and breathes easily, so it is good to wear in summer.

I was also surprised to find that when I was wearing it, it kind of looked like western clothes. It fits very naturally, and doesn’t look as “costume” -like as some yukata do.

Anyway, just thought I’d share, because I like it so much!

I started tidying stuff today. A minimalist blog was talking about cleaning out your house, and it said “Oh, just do one cabinet. Take a first step”.

“Oh yeah, I have to clean out this apartment in the next 3 weeks and ship stuff home and get ready to move into the sad house, don’t I?” I thought.

UGH, GROSS, CLEANING.

I started on the bookshelf in the kitchen. Took everything out, threw away two boxes of stuff (!) packed up a bunch of things that need to be run through a shredder (too embarrassing / financial to be just tossed in the trash) and sorted the rest. There are…

• Things I need to ship home
• Things I can leave for the next person
• Things that I need to keep around (things I use, or will need in order to settle matters in the future)

And the rest of it is trash! The end!

Last night I packed up my Stuff Swap bags: clothes I want to give away for free. Actually, I rescued a skirt from the bag (I’m wearing it now). But the rest of it, I thought “Oh, hmm, I forgot I owned that. OH WELL, DON’T NEED IT!”

Some things, I had a moment of thought, “Oh, but I like that. I want to wear it. I should keep that…”

NO! There is a big difference between “I want to wear it” and I WILL wear it!”

I scolded myself, gently, and let it all go. Whoosh, whoosh. I am waiting now, for the person who is supposed to pick up my bags… but I have Awa Odori in 15 minutes so they had better hurrrrrrry up….

• School lunch
  Today was curry pilaf with sweet chicken, cabbage, potato salad & miso soup. SO DELICIOUS.
• School Trip to Hokkaido
  Both my schools took school trip to Hokkaido this past week. I did not go, so why do I love it?

  THE OMIYAGE (souvenirs)

  Hokkaido omiyage are basically all made out of chocolate. The big omiyage attraction, Shiroi Koibito (White Lovers) Park, is a chocolate factory. That’s all. I mean, Hokkaido has other stuff, like Lavender Ice Cream and Ghengis Khan (lamb kebab, usually in all-you-can-eat format) but those don’t translate into souvenir food so well. So, chocolate it is!  Yum yum yum.

• Speaking Japanese
  I am trying to sort through the paperwork of leaving Japan (it’s a bureaucratic nightmare just trying to get a plane ticket). Because my visa will expire before I actually leave, I had to call the immigration office today, to ask about changing my visa. There is a lot of info online, but most is contradictory, so I needed to know when I had to file by. I have to take time off work to go down to Komatsushima and do filing, so it’s important to have all the stuff I need before I go.

  The clerk I talked to was all “No English”, so I did my best in Japanese… and got all the info that I wanted. Some clarification came from a former ALT who did this all last year, but I feel so good every time I can do communication. Ha ha!

We ate this in Osaka, in Shinsaibashi, for last weekend’s bachelorette party. This was between 3 people, a giant chicken, onion, pepper, mushroom, sauce pizza. Oh my GOD, it was fantastic.

Oh and the rest of Osaka was good too.

We ate Thai, Mexican, Pizza, danced until 2 am, and then  went to Spa World and soaked it all up.  Is there anything better than relaxing in an onsen? I THINK NOT! Robin and I also forked over the money to have all the dead skin scrubbed off our backs by old ladies. Smooth!

Back in Tokushima, I went out to coffee and had this.

It’s an azuki latte!

With some kind of special milk.

At the bottom were boiled azuki beans. Sweet!

By the way, this is day two of being on a diet, and I was already breaking it. HAHA! Some things are just not meant to be.

Cell phone charms! I bought the My Neighbor Totoro doll in Osaka. 5 cell phone straps is maybe a bit much, but I like all of them so much… I bought / was given them specifically, so I can’t choose which ones to take off.

Also in Osaka, I found a Totoro pencil board (which you use as a writing surface / to put between pages to stop pencil from transferring) and some finger puppets.

Home made pudding by my shamisen teacher. So delicious!

It was HORRIBLY hot that day, so I wore a yukata. Nice and breezy airflow! But… I had to walk to her house, which took ages.

On the way home, I was lured in by the KenTaco truck. 10 takoyaki for 500 yen! Fresh off the grill! I couldn’t believe it, it was so hot and humid, but the guy in the takoyaki truck was just going on over his grill like it was no problem. Tough!

They were real delicious. I went home and gobbled them up!

A sunny clear day in Tokushima.

A sunny clear day in… KYOTO!

Yesterday Cassie and I went to the Ten no ji (temple) market: a big mash of food tents, craft tents, and antique tents on the streets and grounds of Ten no ji. The bus to get there was packed, and so were the grounds.

We were there specifically in search of cheap kimono, which we found in abundance! In some tents they were nicely folded on tables or displayed in racks, but mostly, (in the really good tents) it was just a huge pile on a tarp, with Obaachans (grandmas) kneeling all around, tugging their precious finds away from grasping hands.

We did sharp-elbow battle with the Obaachans, and emerged victorious (and not that much poorer! Each kimono / obi went for about 1000 yen, haha!)

Cassie and her haul.

My haul (and purse. Note the two water bottles. It was hot and horrible and I was sick as a dog… and still am. Cough, hack)

I’m a little shamed by the lack of photos of this day, but really… it was too damn hot. And I felt too damn sick to care.

My haul, hanging up to get rid of the funny smell. I got 4 obi and 3 kimono (the extra yellow obi is just hanging up to get the wrinkles to relax)

This one is my favorite. Look at that ship! From my position on the tarp, I couldn’t reach it, so I was shouting at Cassie “Get the pink one! No, the other pink. To your left. More left! More left! THAT ONE!!”

It has a few unsavory spots, but I think I can clean them out well. THAT SHIP! It’s such a nice pale pink, too.

This was a lucky find at the end. We found kimono that we wanted first at other stalls, then rifled through to find obi that would match. This photo is not so good, in real life it’s much richer. The background is actually a very deep pumpkin color. Also, my skin is not that white.

Bought to go with a black komon (small pattern) and another weird purple kimono that I bought. Originally I wasn’t too wild about the kimono because finding an obi was a right pain the butt… the patterns were too small and weird. BUT this one suits, I think. It’s bizarro enough.

When we were picking stuff out, I was trying hard, and these ladies behind me were giving suggestions… and comments. We couldn’t figure out some of the words though. “Oh, that obi is too _____ for that kimono. Ah, but she’s a foreigner, it doesn’t matter”.

I know obi and kimono should match in range of quality (one can’t be fancier than the other, or out of the acceptable range) and complimentary color, and material, and season… but I don’t know all the words for it! So obviously the orange one is SLIGHTLY wrong for the blue kimono, but you know what…. like she said, I’m a foreigner. I wear these because I like them, not because I want to be perfectly Japanese (or Japanese at all… I just want to wear clothes I like!)

It’s a funny thing, deciding how to break the rules of a strict fashion.

Obviously, I don’t know all the rules of kimono (and probably never will). So I can’t really say I know the rules ENOUGH to break them. But I’m a foreigner… is breaking small rules acceptable, or ridiculous?

There is also the thing of wearing them outside Japan. I really like to wear them. I like how they feel. But you get that look, “You’re trying too hard. You wish you were Japanese. You’re showing off. You’re being an idiot. You’re appropriating a culture that isn’t yours.”

Sometimes the statement my clothes makes is “I like how this looks and feels. I am happy wearing it, so I wear it.”

Also in Osaka, I bought two Lolita skirts (clicky the link if you like… it’s not western lolita, just a name appropriated for a type of fashion). They are knee length, poofy, and very colorful. There is no way that lolita fashion will ever be my fashion (it’s too expensive). Nor do I identify myself as “a lolita”. But damn it, I’ve never worn a skirt that felt so good. And I love the look.

So…

I guess, I love fashion, and wearing a mix of things, but I hate having to think about how it would be analyzed or perceived. I hate having to justify a choice in my mind, rather than just choosing and happily walking out the door.

So probably I’ll have to live in a cabin in the wilderness where nobody cares. HA! Or SF, NY (eh..) or similar.

Ok, whining over.

Look at those colors! Aren’t they great?? ARGH I love them so much! I also bought a maroon obi, that you can barely see in the first photo, to go with this blue kimono.

Definitely didn’t expect to love this kimono so much, but the more I look at it, the more I want to pair it with different colors and decorations!